there was never anyplace for someone like me to be totally happy

I’m such a blathering idiot, writing things… anything to distract myself from what I’m really feeling and what I really should be writing or saying or doing…

But not tonight. It hurts too much and I am just too tired.

As if anyone cares about my classes next year. As if I even care. *sigh*

grandma said destiny’d blow me away
nothing’s gonna blow me away

all my life i’ve been searching for something…

Picking out classes for next year. So far:

JOUR4000 - the stupid generic J class we have to take.
JOUR4207 - Professional Practices: Television Reporting
JOUR4201 (or something) - Specialized reporting.. either Arts or Science. Maybe Social Issues? Really, whichever one someone will take with me. I know I will hate whichever one I choose.
JOUR4208 - Video Documentary
CLCV2300 -Introduction to Archaeology
CLCV3201 - Studies in Greek History (the Spartans!!)
CLCV4something - some type of fourth year classics class that I have no idea what the topics are yet. Or when they are. Or anything.

This is a good distraction from the sadness in me right now. Dreaming of the future always is. Plus side is, got the official letter offering me $2500 again for next year. So at least that’ll pay for my summer courses. Money stresses me out. But I should get paid (finally) on Thursday.

just give me many chances, i’ll see you through it all…

Couldn’t sleep last night. Again. Though I was exhausted. Think I must’ve slept about 3-4 hours total… the best of which was right before my alarm went off, of course. This better not be a habit…

Still awake…


just passing through…

I’m not tired, don’t want to go to sleep. But I have absolutely nothing else to do. Surprise, surprise.

My life is so boring it hurts. I’m always waiting around for pieces of other people’s time. Thanks for making my days off oh so much fun, world.

I have so many thoughts running through my head. I’ve been in a really sad mood since Friday. I wish I had someone to talk to. But instead I’ll go to bed and lie awake for hours because I can’t get my head to shut up.